Sunday, June 01, 2008

May 23

Up at 5:00 am and out the door by 6:00. We got to the airport in an hour! Maf deposited me in the appropriate line and after a couple hugs he was gone! :o( And I was alone again! Moments later I found out my flight was going to be delayed by 5 hours!! That would mean I'd miss my sea plane flight to Salt Spring! I didn't panic, I checked in, I headed to the departure area. I figured I'd talk to someone there, someone would be able to help me! After waiting for a rep from the airline to show up I found out there was NOTHING they could/would do for me.... On my own I figured out how to call James collect (2am BC time) to tell him the news of my delay. I gave him the phone number for the sea plane and he called in the morning when he got up. Meanwhile.... Airports are not designed for when things go wrong, they are designed for people in - people out. Not poor people who have to wait 8 friggon hours for their plane to take off. The Manchester airport is dirty, people do not use the garbage cans, they leave their rubbish all around. The people working there have a huge job of cleaning up after disgusting patrons! AND every 10 Min's there is one of two announcements. One warning not to smoke and one warning not to leave bags unattended. In the eight hours of my wait I must have heard them more than 50 times! Oh and get this! The flight is delayed because of FOOTBALL! Stoopid sports! :o( We finally were able to board but we didn't take off till 6:30. I did my best to keep upbeat about it all, no point freaking out. I did ask a steward on the plane if there was anything that could be done for me because I was going to be stranded at the airport. He said someone would be there to meet several of us who needed help. I could talk to the person then... I figured it wouldn't hurt to ask if they could put me in a hotel...







We landed after 10pm BC time, no one was there to meet us, the woman at the information desk tried to get someone to come meet with us but no one showed up. I watched our flight crew leave...no one was accountable to the several of us who were stranded! Most of the people were able to make other arrangements but the few of us who couldn't were left to figure it out for ourselves.
When I got my suitcase I went to the vending machines. I only had Canadian $20's. There was a chip machine that took $20's so I was going to buy a bag of chips I didn't want in order to get change to get a drink...the *%&!#% machine ate my $20!!! The seaplane office opened at 7am so I had from 10pm to 7am to wander the Vancouver airport. It is much nicer than the Manchester airport BUT the seats were just as uncomfortable. There were no loud announcements so the times I was able to doze I wasn't shocked out of it by a booming voice! I called James, IM'd James and Beth from the airport computer. (25 Min's of Internet time for $2.00, pretty good!) I ate crappy airport food, read, watched a movie...... time eventually passed and at 6:30 I took a taxi to the sea plane office. Salt Spring Air is a great company, they didn't make me pay for the ticket I missed, they were friendly and kind and they got me home. The pilot is pretty new to Salt Spring and he mentioned he has 2 daughters around Willow's age. They haven't moved here yet (in a couple of months they will be here) so we exchanged contact info and when they get here we are going to get the girls together. Maybe they will become friends!


After a 20 min flight we land in Ganges, and I saw Willow and James on the dock waiting for me.
By the time I got home and gave presents and had a bite to eat I had been up for 48 hours!

My trip had come to its end! My two weeks away seemed longer in a way. I got to meet people who I had only known online, and whom I now know are friends for life! (you guys aren't getting rid of me LOL)
Thank you again to Maf for bringing me over, Beth for sharing your love of glass art and for your friendship, to Lee for my new hair, to Maf and Lee for the Snug and all that comes from being Snugly, thanks to Barry for the gift of falling out of a plane and the DVD proof that I did it, to Kelly for allowing me to share in your birthday celebration. I had a great time! And boy it's good to be home!

T
May 21

Barry was going to drive me to a train station in Birmingham, but he woke up feel under the weather AND he had been driving a lot over the several days I was there! So he and Kelly drove me to a near by train station and before I knew it I was on my own again. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I have known Barry for approx 18 years or so. He stayed with me and my roommate back in Hamilton, Ontario. I then stayed with him. He visited James, Willow and I when Willow was 5. It was great to see him again and to meet his gal, Kelly. I felt welcome and even spoiled (my money wasn't any good there! LOL) I appreciate Barry's friendship and hospitality and hope he and Kelly come visit soon! I really enjoyed sky diving and WILL do it again. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ It goes without saying, but I will say it anyway, that everyone I stayed with (Maf, Beth, Barry) as well as Lee are all welcome to come visit me here on Salt Spring!


So I am on a train to London... I feel nervous and jittery to be taking the train by myself, knowing I had to take two underground trains (the tube), then 2 more trains. I was way more scared to do this than I was jumping out of a plane! The train arrived in London, I dragged my suitcase (up or down) many stairs to the tube - one stop, my case (up or down) another million steps to the next tube platform - four stops. My suitcase (up or down) another million stairs to the train station, where everyone but me knew what was going on and how things work. I had to go to information three times before I figured out what I had to do and where I had to go. I made it on the right train but it was so crowded I had to sit on a seat outside the toilet (which was out of order thankfully so no noxious fumes!) Now something strange happened on this train. When I walked in I noticed a young woman behind the concession stand. She looked familiar, (remember the Scottish guys from the plane? They had been talking to this woman on the flight!) I asked her if she has flown from Canada recently and she said yes. I find it really strange to have a) run into someone from the flight b) recognized them c) I wasn't suppose to be on that train, I was suppose to be dropped at Birmingham d) it was a long train and I went into 1 car (was too full so sat by the toilets) Had I entered a different car I would not have see her. Had I gone to Birmingham I would have not seen her.... I would love to know what the odds of this situation happening. I told Maf and he seemed just as astounded as I was/am...

On this train I chat to the guy who was sitting in the other seat near the loo. He was a nice enough guy, we chatted about the usual kinds of things I found myself chatting about on public transportation. He thought I was American at first. :op He and his wife were throwing a small football party that night and so he got many calls from her about what kind of beer, how much beer, what kind of food etc....
After a short stop at Crewe I was on the last leg of my train journey. This train was less crowded, I had a chat with a youth worker from London who was going home for a visit. Before I knew it I was in Prestayn and Maf was there to get me! We went to Lee's favourite take out, (James') and I made the mistake of having the greasy fried stuff (more about that later). After hanging out for a while Maf and I went to pick up Lee and we all went to karaoke.







This was only my second time at a karaoke gig but I do know that I prefer Lee's style of hosting. The guy who was doing it seemed more eager to perform then let others (not that there were many of us). Though he did "Sweet Transvestite" and did an fabulous job at it! Maf sang several songs, another guy was there and he sang several, Lee sang one with the host. A young woman named Grace sang as well and she was the star of the night! She had an amazing voice and seemed like a really sweet person. She was with her mum and her mum was so proud of her. They left and then Maf and I got up and sang (was it a BNL's Maf?)
As we were leaving the bar I noticed a really strange looking bird sitting behind someones car. Maf and Lee thought I was weird for being amazed by A DUCK but it was a freaky looking duck!



So I had four glasses of wine at the bar and then Maf, Lee and I went back to Maf's. I had a little gin, we (tried) playing Guitar Hero (I stink!) Lee showed up a couple of card tricks that amaze me still! And before we knew it, it was 2am! Before Lee staggered home he promised to come back at 9am to take me to his hair salon to get my hair done. I didn't really believe him.....


May 22
9am - knock knock knock... it is Lee to pick me up to get my hair done! BUT unfortunately a combination of a lot of travel, drinking and bad food left me *vom* and really out of sorts. Lee called his salon and re booked me for later in the day. I spent the day on Maf's couch and in his bathroom. I finally pulled myself together somewhat and we went to get my hair done. All my wacky colours were covered over with a respectable red and my hair was given a cut. Thanks again Lee and Lee's stylists for giving me a new doo to go home with! Three hours later and Maf and I were headed back to his place to get ready for the last SNUG of the season. I truly wish I had not been ill this day, my energy was really low and I felt really poorly! Blog of the last Snug show (of the season) to follow...........................................................A taste of what's to come...

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

May 16th

Maf played perfect host, taking Beth and I to the nearby town for some window shopping. We walked up the hill to catch a great view of the sea and town. Later we went to a village for lunch and nature walk. It was really cool to hang out with the two of them. It was a relaxing day of site seeing. We played 'yellow car' all day but Maf included gold, cream and even lime green.






We went back to Maf's and played a little bit of PS3 - An eye toy game where we had to save little alien guys.

Later we went out for Indian food, it was pretty good. Though the mango chutney had a hint of mold taste to me. I mentioned it out loud and Maf stopped eating it too. There was another dip that both Maf and Beth hated but I thought it was pretty good, a bit oily, but yummy!

After dinner we went to Lee's karaoke. I was too scared to sing alone so Maf, Lee and I sang Four Minuter Warning together. I was more scared of karaoke then I was about sky diving! Lee is a fab karaoke master. He's so relaxed and funny! Mind you a lot of the joking he did were inside jokes to the Snug people that were there.

We went back to Maf's and I slept soundly with my ear plugs in.

May 17th

Beth and I were on the road back to her place at 9am-ish. We missed Maf and Lee so we created a variation on 'yellow car'. We included all of Maf's wacky colours and called out 'Maf yellow'. Then we decided all highly unusual colours would be for Lee and we'd call out 'ewwwwww Lee'. Colours like pink or shocking colours that you just couldn't help saying 'ewwwww Lee' about. We sang BNL songs for ages and generally had a great time back, aside from a bump or two along the way. Cell phones both a blessing and a curse!

We got to Beth's mom's house to get her girls. Her mom had made a feast for us but we couldn't stay because Barry was going to be picking me up. So we made buns for the roads and they really hit the spot! Thanks Beth's mum!! Wish we could have stayed and had a chat!

We made it back to Ledbury and I packed up and before I knew it Barry was there to get me. It was a very sad moment saying good-bye to Beth and the girls. I still had a week in the UK but it was the last time I was going to see Beth! :o(

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
My time in Prestayn was really cool. Meeting Maf and Lee was an awesome experience. They were as amazing in real as they are on the show. Really I was there because of Maf! Who would have thought over three years ago I would find the Snug and three years later I am there in person! Thank you, thank you, thank you Maf!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So I pile my stuff into Barry's tiny mid-life crisis. There wasn't enough room for my bag of food so I left it with Beth.

The ride to Barry's house was long, especially after driving four hours already. We arrive at Harwich pretty late and I was exhausted. We ordered Chinese food take out, I ate what I could and then went to bed. I didn't realize you have to order sweet and sour sauce separately (say that five times fast ~ sweet and sour sauce seperately, sweet and sour sauce seperately, sweet and sour sauce separately........)

May 18th

We went grocery shopping in the morning. Then we went to visit Barry's mum. Way back 15 years ago I stayed with Barry and his mum while I waited for James to save enough money to come over. It was great to see her after all those years. She gave me a couple of books and I got a cookbook back that I had left behind all those years ago.

We then went for a walk at the abandoned war facility. It was great but so nasty with rubbish!






Then we went to feed the local swans.


We had a pretty mellow day and went to bed fairly early.

May 19th

We went to Colchester to visit the castle. It was a bit touristy for my liking but was still cool to wander around. I bought a few pressies for Willow. We wandered the town as well and bought a bunch of cool things, an addition to our Carrcasonne game, Barry bought a t-shirt with cats for Willow and I picked up other odds and ends. Then we stopped by a broken down Abby, apparently destroyed by Henry the 8th. There was a piece of the on the ground so I grabbed it. I wonder what it is about humans that we like to collect rocks so much!




We went back to Barry's and I had my left over take out, with the sweet and sour sauce I was missing the first night. I had another early night since we were going to sky dive the next day.

May 20th

We woke up early and were on the road by 7am. It was a long drive to Headcorn and traffic was bad, so we ended up being late and at the back of the line for jumping. We spent a long day waiting for the weather to clear. It was Kelly's birthday and she was finding it difficult to be sitting around not knowing if we'd get a chance to jump. But finally the sky began to clear and the first set of three jumps happened, then the second set. Finally it was our turn. We did the training, got suited up, and got onto the plane.

I was not scare, excited but not scared. Mark was the instructer I tandomed with. They have to have over 800 jumps so I felt completely safe. Everyone else got out before me and then it was my turn. We scooted over to the door, rocked forward, then back then out of the plane. That's when it hit me, that's when I realized 'this is falling!!'. As we fell to the earth I found myself inflicted with a temporary turrets, I was swearing like mad! The DVD didn't pick it up though, it just shows me with a crazy face, trying to breath way up there. The straps from the harness were really tight, very uncomfortable once the chute opened up, though on the ground it felt like a crazy sex suit! LOL A jog around the field might have done me some good! wink wink nudge nudge! So we waited hours and hours for something that took probably 10 Min's or so from take off to landing. My landing was pretty damn good too, we landed on our feet.



Unfortunately on the way back to Barry's I felt really ill and had to stop to :vom:, but once I did I felt much better. So after the long drive back we went out for a drink and had dinner and then slept, because the next day I was going back to the Snug.

I'll end for now but the 21st will be about my scary and exhausting journey by train, tube, tube, train and then train! 6 hours or so.....

Monday, May 26, 2008

May 10th

My trip to the UK started with a sea plane leaving Salt Spring for Vancouver airport. Much faster to take the sea plane then the ferry and buses. I watched James and a sad Willow on the dock as the sea plane took off.





Twenty minutes later we landed near the airport and there was a shuttle bus waiting to take me right to the airport.






All went well with checking in and I wandered the airport till it was time to take off. I was well prepared with travel tablets, they make me sleepy as well as make sure I wouldn't be sick on the plane. I had also brought ear plugs so I could rest better on the plane. It was lucky I did! Several Scottish guys were on the plane and boy were they excited about football! Mind you I wasn't annoyed with them I just did my best to block them out. Five hours into the flight some of the people were getting really annoyed and actually shouted at them. Someone said something about 'if you want to act like this then go on a bloody cruise'. They did somewhat quiet down but still managed to act insulting to the people who just wanted quiet.

There were three seats across where I sat, I got the window seat, the middle one was empty and a young guy sat on the isle seat. (god do I feel old saying that) I rested for the first little while and then drinks were offered and I had a glass of wine. Then snacks and then the meal. I made myself eat because I knew it would be a long day. During the meals the guy (I know his name starts with a J) and I chatted about a variety of topics. Music, TV, Canada, the UK (especially Wales, where he was from), the Snug. I gave him the Snug info and he said he was going to listen! He didn't! :( Other times I rested, zoning out to make time go faster. Before I knew it we landed. Going though customs was mostly fine. The custom's agent asked all sorts of questions. Why was I there? - holiday, Was I there to visit family? - no friends, Boyfriend?? - no friends, I'm married, Why isn't your husband with you?? - ummm he's at home with our daughter...... I thought I'd get questions like business or pleasure, how long is your stay? do you have funds to support yourself while here. Not questions out of the 1950's - where is your husband mam?! I got through with customs, got my suitcase and dragged it to the bus station near by and bought my ticket to Ledbury. I had to call Maf for Beth's phone number. All my planning and I manage to forget Beth's phone number!

By now it's May 11th....
I caught the bus to Birmingham where I was able to get the connecting bus to Ledbury. The major thing I noticed in Birmingham were giant billboards of Gordon Ramsay's face every other block! Now I thinks he's fab but he doesn't really have the kind of face that looks good 20 feet tall. The Birmingham bus station was busy and dirty. I passed the time by chatting to the occasional older lady, I watched one lady's suitcase while she went to the 'loo', another woman was going in to buy water so I gave her money to get me one. She was an 'interesting character' though somewhat racist, talking about the immigrants being the problem with England. I did notice Birmingham was multi-cultural but for her it was a dreadful problem.


My bus finally came and I was on the road to Beth's! It was quite a warm day and a woman sat in the seats in front of me. She was very sweaty and ermmm how to say this politely.... an aroma arose and wafted in my general direction and it was not pleasant. But all things come to an end and we finally arrived in Ledbury.



As I was looking for my suitcase I saw Beth and Poppy there to greet me. After a quick hug and retrieving my case we were walking to her home! 24 hours from my house to Beth's.
The whole thing wasn't too bad, I was in good spirits, well prepared for where I needed to go, had food and water. So it could have been worse...just wait for the tale of my trip home....but that will come much later! Beth and I head to the pub for a quick drink and chat. I felt as ease with Beth right away, like we've know each other for years. Well we have known each other for years, just never in person. And for us to get along as well as we did, never having met in 'real life' was amazing!



I didn't eat anything for dinner (tea), just not up to it after such a long journey.
My brain is hazy on some of the details but after hanging out for a bit we went to bed. [Beth feel free to add details I miss. It will refresh my memory]

May 12th
{{{{HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO....JAMES!}}}
Poppy was my alarm in the morning, and I sat up on the couch feeling groggy and strange. Beth's girls came to chat to me on and off as they got ready for school. I got myself dressed and teeth brushed and walked to school with Beth and the girls. Then Beth and I walked back to her house and I got a ride to the grocery store and Beth went on to work.
Shopping in another country is an unusual experience, especially if you are particular like me. I bought a number of things, nutella (which I never opened), Cheerios (never opened), a container of something I thought was yogurt and turned out to be compote. It was in the yogurt section! And the container looked like it was fruit yogurt... So in the end I had two bags of groceries to carry back. One thing that was odd was they don't bag your groceries there, here at home most of the time they bag your groceries and occasionally you do it yourself. I headed back to Beth's but missed the street to turn down, so several blocks later I turned right. I knew the direction of the street, and the name of the street, just not it's exact location. I headed in that direction and then when I saw someone I asked where the street was. I was meandering for less than 10 Min's but Beth told Maf I was lost for 2 hours! LOL Sure make fun of the Canadian!


Back at Beth's I had a bite to eat and then a rest till Beth came home. I had a strange experience while in the place between awake and asleep. For some unknown reason I heard 'kamikaze origami toast'. Don't know what it meant but that's what I heard in the bizarre dream state. After dinners were gotten Beth introduced me to the wonderful world of glass bead making. She is very talented at it, making it seem effortless. But after trying it I realized it's not as easy as she makes it look! Not long after that we went to bed. [Again Beth am I remembering right?]

May 13th
I had a really vivid dream about Beth and her family getting up and hanging out in the living room. At one point Sian is bugging Beth to the point she gets a spanking. In the dream I remember thinking 'oh no more company manners'. Then (still in the dream) Beth and I are walking in her village, going to a local business that sold her glass creations and she says she makes 800 pounds a week but has to pay 250 commission.
Then Poppy really woke me up and I realized I hadn't actually been awake. I didn't walk with the girls to school but promised to walk with them the next day.

Once everyone had gone I had breakfast and got ready and then headed out to explore the town. I pretty much wandered aimlessly, going into shops, buying little things for Willow along the way. I then walked up the road to the church and was taking pictures as I went. At one point an old man with a can seemed to spot me and stopped in his tracks.



I kept walking and he just stood there, looking at me. It wasn't until I was in the church grounds that he started walking again.


It was just odd...
After that I went back to Beth's, we got the girls, and went for a drive to a veggie market. Holly suggested lemon curd, which she loves to eat on toast. To me it sounded like the strangest thing I had heard of. I didn't try it on toast (yet) but I did eat some with a spoon and it was yummy, but on toast?! After the market we drove by Beth's old house. It was an amazing looking house but not practical in the winter. It was great to hang out with the three girls, chatting and having fun.

I think the Wii fit game arrived this day. It was fun to watch them have a go at it. I had not seen a Wii in action before so it was fun to watch. It's always interesting to be part of another family's routines. There was dinner to get, I finally ate a real meal. I was still off kilter from travelling. The girls were in bed by 8:00. It might have been this night I played Stephan Colbert for Beth for the first time. She now understands why he appeals to me! ;o) Also our plans for Thursday Snugness were coming together. The girls were getting picked up Wed after school so that meant we could leave when we wanted to on Thursday morning.
Another day came to an end.





May 14th
As promised I walked with the Beth and the girls to school. When I went back to the house I went back to sleep until half and hour before Beth came back. A bit boring but necessary for my sanity. Then Beth went to get the girls and they came back and got ready to go with their Grandpa. With the girls gone we were really starting to get excited about the Snug show the next day! For dinner got take out from an Italian restaurant and a couple of bottles of wine.
I believe we made more beads that night and then later watched more Stephan Colbert. I gave Beth one of my Colbert buttons (badges). We had a great night drinking wine and chatting.

May 15th

We woke up and got ready for the road. We had good old TOMTOM so didn't have to worry about getting there. I packed my smaller bags and left my big suitcase. Before we knew it we were on the road to The Snug!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Before I continue with the road trip part of this I want to summarize my visit to Beth's home. I was made to feel very welcome by Beth and her girls. Even 'he who must not be named' had his company manners on and was pleasant to me. Holly and Sian drew pictures for me. Holly wrote me the sweetest note to take home, about how she'd miss me. Poppy is a sweet and cuddly little dog. I feel a real friendship with Beth. Having only known her online, it was cool to find out she was is awesome in real life too. I feel my visit to her house, in itself was worth my trip to the UK. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Now on with the road trip. We listened to music on the way, I was introduced to 'yellow car', and we chatted none stop. We made a stop for food on the way and before we knew it TOMTOM had lead us to Maf's door.
There we found a nervous Maf, who was unsure of his hosting abilities but I think we put that to rest with our cool and relaxed natures. He took us for a walk by the sea, acting tour guide, pointing out things of interest. We headed back to his place for pizza.

We all got ready and headed to the pub for the Snug show!! Blog for that show will be done ASAP.

That's all for now!
T

Sunday, May 25, 2008

May 25th

Well dear Snug fans the ending of the Snug has happened. May 22nd was the last Snug show, according to Maf until September. That's when the Snug returns but in what form, we still do not know. There are a few unbelievers but I am with Maf on this, I believe in nonsense and that nonsense will return!


I had the privilege to be at the last two shows and watch as well as participate in the magic! Blogs of those two shows will happen. And though I know there hasn't been a blog in ages I feel my trip to the UK will inspire me. So watch this space because I will be writing about my day to day adventures as well as listen back to both shows and blog about them.

That is all for now, stay tuned to hear about my journey to the Snug side!
T

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

BAD BAD BAD FANS OF SNUG! NO BLOG IN WEEKS!
ANYONE MISS IT? BESIDE MAF AND LEE?
HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM
NEW BLOG COMING SOON.
T
XX

Monday, March 10, 2008

March 6th - Show 191 - Podcast 106

With a bit of a false start the record button is (finally) pressed and the show begins with "sorry sorry sorry". Sorry for last week's poor recording quality and sorry for not realizing he hadn't pressed record. MAF GOT SACKED!! And no that is not a double entendre. He really did get fired! That's our Maf - rule breaker extraordinar. The sad sad tale was told with the usual 'sad segment' music. Fluffy sent Maf beautiful naked glass bead goddesses. Pervy T rears her pervy head and the conversation descends to bum beads.

Lee's had a hair colour change.

Maf faces parenting issues when his 14 year old was suspended when he and his mates attempted to set each other on fire in a paper suit.


TUNE TIME -
Gabriella Kilmel - Sweet About me
Lee plays a song I liked!!! Two thumbs up Lee!!

I got my presents from Maf and from Fluffy! Combo birthday/crimbo.

{{{{{{{28 mins in}}}}}}}

WORDS FROM THE SECRET WORD LIST aberrant Acetone hairy bugger
Thermal shock
MAF 'YOU GOING TO PUT IT IN YOUR BUM MAF? WHAT WHAT?!? HAS TAMARA GONE INSANE?' LEE 'YOU GOING TO PUT IT IN YOUR BUM MAF....' MAF 'WHAAA?!? I DON'T.....IT'S IT'S A LITTLE BEAD! WHAT WHAT DOES SHE THINK?' LEE 'I DON'T KNOW...THEY HAVE...WELL IS IT LIKE...SHE MUST THINK MAYBE IT'S A LOVE BEAD OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.' MAF 'WHAT ARE THEM?' LEE 'WELL THEY HAVE THE LITTLE LONG NECKLACE OF BEAD AND STUFF ON AND...' MAF 'NO.' LEE 'THEY STICK THEM IN PLACES APPARENTLY.' MAF 'NOOOOO NOOOOOO.' LEE 'NOT DOWN HERE! IN LONDON! DOWN IN LONDON AND CANADER AND STUFF' MAF 'LONDON AND CANADA JUST LONDON AND CANADA'

MAF 'YOU BONY LONG FACED BASTARD'
LEE 'DON'T HOLD IT IN WILL YOU.'
MAF 'I'M JUST IN THE MIDDLE OF LOOKING FOR ANOTHER JOB, WELL, I HAVEN'T STARTED YET' 'ALL I'VE EVER DONE...CAN YOU TURN THAT OFF I FEEL LIKE I'M COMPETING!' 'SHE SAID -I'VE MADE SOME BEAD PORN - AND I WENT WHAT YOU USED THE MAGIC WORD THERE....BEAD' 'THERE'S NO WAY I'M SAYING STAY PUFF MARSHMALLOW MAN THERE'
'FLUFFY MAKES GLASS BEADS THAT ARE GOING NO WHERE NEAR BOTTOMS.'
'DOESN'T THE MIND BOGGLE'
'I KNOW WHAT'S A GOOD IDEA, I'M GONNA PUT ON THIS PAPER SUIT SET ME ON FIRE BOYS'
'NOT MASSIVLY ATTRACTIVE BUT YOU KNOW WHEN YOU ARE A CERTAIN AGE...'
LEE 'HOW ARE YOU GOING TO DO THAT YOU HAIRY BUGGER' WORD FROM THE SECRET LIST 'MINMIZE YOUR SHOW NOTES? WHAT DO YOU MEAN FOLD THE PAPER OVER?'
'IF YOU WANT TO YOU CAN STICK THEM UP YOUR BOTTOM.'
'SINCE YOU LOST YOUR JOB YOU'VE BECOME REALLY SELFISH - ME ME ME'